At Home Inside & Out: creating your own private retreat
by Cheryl Bruedigam
Photo - Staff
In addition to my work with
Southwest Flair, as the editor of a successful travel guide, my research has
recently taken me down the road to retreats. Visiting spas, yoga centers, spirit
retreats, luxurious getaways, Zen monasteries, I began to wonder how to
incorporate more of the atmosphere these possess into the atmosphere of my own
home.
The journey included conversations with owners and managers, and reading
everything I could get my hands on. I wanted to completely immerse myself in the
lifestyle of a retreat, a private retreat in my own home in New Mexico.
Make a List
Asking myself what attributes would be most preferable, a list began to
formulate (applicable to the southwest), taking the best of the best, you might
say, and personalizing it.
The list included walking through an herb garden, sitting in a secret garden,
sitting beside a waterfall, swimming and laying beside a pool, burning sage
incense, utilizing candlelight, practicing yoga at least twice a day (once out
of doors in the moonlight), good evening conversation with friends, healthy but
scrumptious vegetarian meals, journal writing, painting and artwork, playing
musical instruments, using luxurious handmade bath products, enjoying cool
evenings with an outdoor fire, taking tea on the deck while watching the sunrise
and celebrating it’s arrival with the Salutation of the Sun.
These things were of course for my family and I to relax, heal and enjoy, but I
realized too because we have so many friends and family visiting summers and
holidays that they too would benefit from visiting our “retreat” in New Mexico,
and I became even more excited at the prospect of sharing and providing these
little escapes and refreshers for them as well.
Once the list was made, I realized I already have all of this and more! It was
an evolution, something we have been working toward for many, many years. It
takes some focus, some work, and most of all the willingness to make changes,
and you too may have your own special private spirit retreat.
Gardens
Photo - Staff
The herb garden is in its third season now and has grown and
matured beautifully. Flagstones meander through its green, relaxing, and
wonderfully scented growth. It requires little care now except occasional
weeding and watering, and perhaps the addition of a new plant when the fancy
strikes. When designing your herb garden, it is very nice to select plants that
will return each year so that they will develop a lush growth making for beauty
and serenity in your garden.
Water
Water is a nice addition to the herb garden or to anywhere within your retreat.
It may be easier than you think to prepare a water area. It can be as small as a
birdbath or as large as a pond. Pre-fabricated ponds are available at home
improvement stores as well as many books on the subject. Select your spot,
outline the shape, and dig your hole. Insert pond and fill with water. Add a
pump and some lilies to the water, some English Ivy or creeping Jasmine to the
border along with some decorative rocks or flagstone and you have a lovely
little escape. Goldfish are hardy, easy to care for and inexpensive, if you wish
to create a really natural environment and they are so serene and peaceful to
watch. They can live up to ten years so they will be with you for some time in
your retreat.
And speaking of water, who would want to go on retreat without being able to get
in the water? Not me. The pool is a must and there are as many options available
as there are tastes and budgets. Size is not the issue, cost is not the issue,
the neighbor’s opinion is not the issue. What matters is: can you get in it, can
you enjoy it, can you float still and stare up at a beautiful cloudless sky or
an incredible full moon, and how it makes you feel submerged and after you get
out. Visuals are important to you, and you only, because this is your own
private retreat so who cares if it’s a kiddie pool if you can relax and get wet?
You can spend thousands of dollars but you don’t have to, just do what you need
to do to satisfy you and you will be happy in your water retreat. Be creative,
be decorative with what you have or can afford. Plants, urns, furniture, and
decking can add to the ambiance easily if on a small budget. Dedicating a small
area nearby to sun in is nice so that you are within easy reach of the water to
return and cool off quickly on those hot summer days.
Photo - Staff
My favorite time is swimming first thing in the morning just after awaking. I
have a cup of hot tea waiting on the table ready to warm me up because our New
Mexico summer nights are cool. We rarely get above the 50s at night and the pool
is not heated so it can be quite brisk first thing in the morning, but there is
no better feeling. The only feeling comparable was once on a camping trip high
in the mountains, my husband and I jumped into a pool created by a dam in a
river. The water was so cold that it not only took my breath away, but my brain
away. Suspended, I hung there momentarily in the water and as I rose to the
surface, it took me a long moment to realize and to think, to think that what I
needed to do was to move my arms and legs in order to swim to the shore. I did
and it remains to this day the top number one most wonderful thing I have ever
done. Afterward I always knew that to revive and refresh, I needed only to find
some really cold water to feel alive and new once again. And now, I have that
every morning (weather permitting).
Sunning for a while after that first morning dip is a good way to get sun
without the intense burning rays of mid-day, making for a gradual but deep and
golden tan, and I am a redhead so the morning sun is kinder. Keep an array of
spa-like outdoor skin products on hand for the southwest climate, tans can
disappear as quickly or quicker than they come out here due to the dryness, so
during tanning and after-sun moisturizing are even more important if you want to
keep your tan in the southwest. And the smell of suntan oil will transport you
instantly to your favorite beach because smells are powerful.
Scents
Incense is one of the most powerful, easiest and most inexpensive ways available
to create a retreat-like environment in your home. If you are after the
southwest feel, sage and cedar are both popular here and are easy to find.
Contrary to some mind-sets, incense is not just for people who smoke marijuana
to cover up the smell with. Ancients, sages, Native Americans, monks, all have
used incense for thousands of years ritually, ceremonially, and otherwise.
Incense can alter your mental state in a number of ways. It can act as an aroma-theraputical
bringing about healing through its scent by use of its medicinal properties, it
can act as a trope taking you on a memorable journey to other places you may
have previously been and noted the smell, or it may act as a stimulant or
relaxant to take you into another mental plane, especially our New Mexico native
sage such as grows wild near Taos. Sage sticks to burn in your home can be
purchased through-out the state or made yourself if you have access to
harvesting a little for the use.
Candlelight is one thing no home should be without whether for daily use or
special occasions. The soft flickering, the added warmth to a room, the ambiance
and atmosphere that can be created with such an easy and inexpensive item makes
all the difference to a retreat-like environment. Candles can be store-bought or
handmade. They are easy to make at home but the wicks can be tricky, so make
sure you can obtain the proper wick size for the size of candle you wish to
make. Candles are so luxurious now, coming in all scents, shapes, colors and
sizes. I cannot get enough vanilla!
Well-being
Photo - Staff
The practice of yoga is essential to a personal retreat. The
body-mind-soul connection brings a level of new understanding to the way you
live each and every moment of each and every day. It was the practice of yoga
that propelled me to begin looking at retreats both for the spiritual and the
physical, which lead me to the notion of creating a private retreat within one’s
home.
About an eight by three feet space is the minimum that you will need. That is
what I began with. Eventually, I knew I wanted more space and cleaned and
re-arranged and had garage sales until I had enough space to create a private
yoga studio within my home. The use of incense and music intensify the practice
creating a total feeling of southwest spirit. A wood floor is ideal. A mat,
woven rug or Indian blanket will work well for comfort beneath you. Practicing
indoors gives me a serenity and a comfort that is reliable and secure.
Practicing outdoors is more of a freeing nature, particularly with the gentle
caress of a high desert breeze coming across your skin as the moon shines down
in approval. A morning salutation to the sun on the back deck offers a nice
stretch, honorable thanks, and a great way to start the day.
As with any getaway, good
conversation in the evening whether around a fire, a cook-out, or simply in a
garden or patio setting, is essential to unwind from the day, stimulate the
brain and share ideas. Arranging group seating areas can be fun and easy. The
herb garden may contain a rustic bench, the secret garden an intimate setting
with a singular bench, the pool of course has seating around it, the patio area
may contain a table with chairs, and the deck above may provide additional
seating. Whatever the amount of space you have to work with, arrange your
outdoor seating just as you would your indoor seating, make it attractive,
comfortable and above all, conducive to easy flowing conversation.
Meals
What is it like to eat at a fancy
spa or yoga retreat where you are what you eat? It should be a diet and menu
that we want to partake of every day because we want to be healthy, glowing and
energetic. Here are some sample menus from various types of retreats:
At a yoga retreat you will find Ayurvedic food. For a Vatta dosha (what the heck
is that you are wondering), in accordance to Ayurvedic healing, there are three
doshas or body types of which a person may be of one, two of, or a rarer combo
of all three. I do not know if there is a most common type but I am a Vatta, so
that is the sample I have selected from Amadea Morningstar’s, “The Ayurvedic
Cookbook,” for a summer day.
Breakfast is breakfast rice, and hot tea or milk. Lunch includes zucchini and
mung dal (beans), rice, whole wheat chappatis, and yogurt (optional). For a
snack, fresh figs, apricots, peaches, or melon. Dinner is buttermilk kadhi over
noodles and a yam salad. For dessert, coconut macaroons. Choice of beverage for
all meals includes cool bansha tea, digestive Tea, carrot juice, zingy hibiscus
cooler, cool mint tea, caffix or rana, lemonade, or fruit juice (diluted 1:1
with water).
What are some other serving ideas with a spa-like flair? For a breakfast with
southwestern flavor, Bishop’s Lodge in Santa Fe, New Mexico, offers blue corn
meal griddle cakes, French toast, fluffy blue corn cakes with piñon nuts,
battered egg bread dusted with sugar, and warm maple syrup and butter. The
Golden Door in Escondido, California, is renowned for high-flavor, low-fat
recipes with organic vegetables from their garden prepared by Michel Stroot,
Executive Chef. The Blue Fire Grill at southern California’s La Costa Resort and
Spa, boasts entrees such as grilled Atlantic salmon with mango mustard glaze,
wild mushroom, saffron risotto and salsa verde and green tea mint.
Granted most of us are not world-class chefs and the thought of preparing one of
these types of meals may send us running to the nearest Burger King, so
incorporate what works for your health and your lifestyle. Keep it healthy, keep
it simple, or take it one step further to learn to prepare meals like those
mentioned above and lose yourself in the luxury of the preparation itself.
Relax with the arts
You may want to begin jotting those recipes down in the journal you will be
keeping. Journaling is one of the healthiest and most important things you may
do for yourself because the art of writing is retreating. Letting yourself go
once or several times a day, whether to record the beauty of your garden, to
release verbal stress, or simply to clear your mind and note your thoughts, keep
a lovely, personalized journal handy. Handwritten, your journal is your own
therapeutic tribute to documenting your life. I keep all of my “goodies” in a
basket with a carry handle so that I may easily move it to any area indoors or
outdoors. That way I always have the essentials at hand when the mood strikes:
journal, favorite assortment of pens, reading glasses, a current magazine or
two, the current book or books that I am reading, and a little incense.
Anything artistic is relaxing, especially painting. Imagine yourself in your
secret garden as the early morning light streams in, with your easel set just
so, your paints mixed and your canvas awaiting your creation. Not a painter? Who
cares! It’s great fun, relaxing, and can become very satisfying once you spend
some time at it. Some of the most memorable relaxing hours I have spent were
painting, sketching, animating, and though it is not quite in the same category,
quilting. Photography is another wonderful addition to your retreat.
Photographing your beautiful gardens, the first rose bloom, a butterfly, your
child or even your golden retriever.
Keep some basic musical instruments handy; an acoustic guitar, a drum, a Native
American flute. All have relaxing sounds, and the rhythms you find in your
retreat will come forth from within, resonating with the balance you have
created. It does not matter whether or not you know how to play the instrument.
If you pick something up often enough, you will begin to find your way around.
Besides, this is therapeutic and healing. Find the healing sounds, find the
sounds that appeal to you and go from there.
The Bath
When invoking a retreat-like environment, do not overlook the
bath. When envisioning a bathroom retreat, consider size and space. A bath
should be relaxing and it is difficult to relax in clutter. Minimize your
bathroom decor and contents to spa-like accessories and supplies. Add a plant if
lighting permits. Natural products such as bamboo shades, loofah sponges and
fluffy organic cotton towels enhance the relaxing feel. Candles and oils for
relaxation and scent are inexpensive and contribute much in altering the
environment. Handmade soaps can contribute luxuriously to a healthy, and restful
or refreshing bath. Herbs and natural scrubs such as oatmeal or almonds
invigorate tired skin without chemical residue or reaction. What could be more
enchanting?
Enjoy the evening
After your bath, warm yourself by an outdoor evening fire. From fire pits to
chimeneas, nothing can warm the soul like a fire. Hypnotic and relaxing,
retreating into the fire’s heavenly glow will leave you feeling comfortable and
ready for a good night’s rest. Toss in some sage and sit back. Mesquite wood for
backyard fires is available in the southwest through individual and chain
suppliers.
At the day's end, escape to a bedroom as simple or exotic as your taste desires.
To bring in the feel of checking into a southwest getaway, add rustic log or
traditional Mexican furniture to your scheme. As with the bath, uncluttered is
best, using earthy but soothing colors. Softly playing Native American flute
music will lull you to sleep. Sprinkle rose petals on your bed or rinse your
sheets in lavender water, and set a bowl of scented potpourri by your bedside.
Lavender is said to give you restful sleep, keeping nightmares at bay. If
sleeping with a partner, incorporate a massage into your evening ritual.
Patchouli, the love oil, may be mixed with olive or almond oil for the perfect
couple's massage.
Awaken to a new day
Lastly but not least, arise in the mornings to sample a steaming cup of tea as
you sit on your deck, beside your garden, or simply looking out from your
kitchen table, as you anticipate and plan the day ahead. A gentle salutation to
the sun will awaken and stretch your body while allowing you to give thanks for
the day, your home, your loved ones and your life.
These are just a few suggestions for taking a step toward creating your own
private retreat. Use your imagination, add elements from your favorite vacation
or getaway, and get started living today as you deserve to do. After all, it is
your life. Take charge and make it what you want it to be.
References:
Morningstar, Amadea & Desai, Urmila. Ayurvedic Cookbook, The. 1990. Lotus Press.
Wisconsin.
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